I know I'm not crazy, I've heard of it happening to other guys before. I won't name names, because some might consider this sort of weakness a private matter.
When people dream, it's almost always about someone they know, or at least someone they've seen. But every now and then, I have some dream where the main character is myself and some girl. She's faceless, not in the sense that she doesn't have face, but rather in the sense that I don't remember it as soon as my head rises up from my pillow.
In this dream, you always fall in love and you're perfectly happy. Perfectly happy, that is, until you realize that it, in fact, wasn't reality. You go about your day mentally pining over her. You can only grasp minute details of her being. The way her hair fell on her shoulders. Her freckles, or her eyes. But never the entire picture.
It's a bittersweet feeling. The sweetness coming from knowing that it's possible she's out there. The bitterness coming from the knowledge that it was most likely just a dream, and the only hope of grasping it again is to have the exact same dream - something that seems to only happen in nightmares.
You clock off from work. You go home and eat dinner. Silently if you eat it alone, silently if you don't. You watch the clock tick by and begin to wonder if you'll ever get tired enough to sleep. The analog clock reads 9:22. You lay your head down and you attempt to sleep. You quietly toss and turn and the analog clock reads 1:43.
You crawl out of bed the next morning, feeling lonely. The Folgers doesn't satiate your bloodshot eyes. You clock back into work. Lather, Rinse, Repeat.
Reading this back to myself makes me feel claustrophobic for some reason. It makes me feel like I'm helplessly trapped in a box. Like it's the worst possible scenario.
However, I have one worse for you.
You know what that is?
When you know exactly who the faceless girl is.
